In a post on her official blog Monday, the 29-year-old "Since U Been Gone" singer and erstwhile American Idol champ launched a campaign to land herself a guest spot on the critically acclaimed NBC sitcom. "Here's the deal ....I really want to be on Parks and Recreation," she writes. "It's hilarious!"
It's so hilarious that Clarkson is imploring her own legion of fans to take up her cause. "So, I'm gonna need all of my fans help please," she says. "Please tweet every member of the cast, the producers, the writers, security in that building, and anyone related to that show and tell them they need to have me on as a guest. Pretty pretty please!"
But just because Clarkson dreams of acting on the show doesn't mean she has visions of an Emmy dancing in her head. "I am a bad actress but maybe I could play a bad actress!" she suggests. "I would nail that!"
Like the other tracks from Stronger that have surfaced — “What Doesn’t Kill You (Stronger)” and “Mr. Know It All” — “You Love Me” is written from the perspective of a scorned lover. “You didn’t let me down / You didn’t tear me apart / You just opened my eyes / While breaking my heart,” Clarkson sings on the midtempo chorus, before getting to the lyrics that explain why the song is named what it is: “You just made me cry by claiming you love me, you love me, you love me.”
The whole thing is laid over driving guitar riffs, so it never gets too sad or weepy. It’s another song that’s sure to please fans — this one here is certainly very pleased with it — even if it doesn’t make a big splash on radio. Take a listen here:
THE GUYS IN KELLY’S LIFE STILL KIND OF SUCK.
Of the 13 tracks on Stronger, at least eight and possibly as many as ten deal with Kelly being dumped, cheated on, neglected, misunderstood, let down and just generally treated poorly by romantic partners. What’s more, there is no “My Life Would Suck Without You”-type song where love actually inspires feelings that fall in the positive end of the emotional spectrum—the closest she comes are the shreds of romantic hope found in “Standing in Front of You” and “Breaking Your Own Heart”—which when you think about it, is kind of like Beyoncé following up “Crazy in Love” with an album of “Me, Myself and I”s.
MAX MARTIN AND DR. LUKE ARE NOWHERE TO BE FOUND ON THE CREDITS…
Remarkably, the producers and songwriters who co-engineered three of Kelly’s all-time biggest hits—”Since U Been Gone,” “Behind These Hazel Eyes” and “My Life Would Suck Without You”—are MIA on Stronger. Give Kelly credit for jumping off the bandwagon everyone else is jumping on, or give Max and Luke the credit for being so in demand they couldn’t pencil in time for their one-time moneymaker.
BUT THEIR FINGERPRINTS ARE STILL ALL OVER THE RECORD.
Give the average informed pop listener a spin through “I Forgive You” and “You Can’t Win” and they’ll undoubtedly guess that Max and Luke were the knob-twiddlers behind them—both songs boast the kind of streamlined production, compact hooks and burst-out energy that the duo perfected with Kelly over the course of their handful of collaborations.
THERE’S DANCE GROOVES TO BE HAD.
Not to say that “What Doesn’t Kill You (Stronger)” or “Dark Side” would necessarily go over well at a club on a Saturday night, but there’s definite disco influences on both, with the kind of synth-heavy sound and pounding four/four beats that that would imply—even if they’re a little laid back in tempo to inspire much fist-pumping. It’s a nice fit for Kelly, and both songs are among the album’s best.
THERE’S ALSO HANDCLAPS, BENDY SYNTHS AND THAT AWESOME AIRY KEBOARD SOUND THAT KEEPS SHOWING UP IN POP.
You know the one we mean—you can hear it in Wiz Khalifa’s “The Race,” Linkin Park’s “Shadow of the Day,” even underground favorites Destroyer’s “Bay of Pigs,” and now you can hear it Kelly’s “You Can’t Win” as well. The other two are in “Hello” and “I Forgive You,” respectively, and they are more than welcome additions to pretty good songs.
THE OPENING LYRICS TO “LET ME DOWN” ARE UNCONSCIONABLY BAD…
“I think I might be a fortune teller / I read your face just like a letter.”
BUT THE CHORUS TO “EINSTEIN” IS WAY, WAY WORSE.
“And I may not be Einstein / But I know dumb plus dumb equals you.” (Seriously. We had five minutes’ worth of “She didn’t really just say that?…” deliberation in the office before we had to own up to the awful truth.)
YOU LOVE ME” IS PROBABLY THE BEST SONG.
It’s been true in pop music for the entirety of the 21st century—when in doubt, look to the ’80s for guidance. “You Love Me” has the drama, hookiness and light, echo-y production of a great John Hughes-era torch song. And don’t worry—despite the title, it’s still a bummer of a love song. (It’s as in, “You just made my cry by claiming that you love me.”)
PEREZ HILTON IS NOT A FAN.
That’s right: The guy who thinks that Lady Gaga walks on water and that every new Katy Perry song and video is a transmission from the heavens actually has something negative to say about the new Kelly Clarkson album. Tweets ‘Rez:
If you’re a female pop star and you can’t even get Perez on your side…it’s not a great sign.
NO MATTER WHAT, HER VOICE IS STILL AWESOME.
Whether ballads like “Honestly” or “Breaking Your Own Heart” or more upbeat numbers like “You Love Me” or “I Forgive You,” Kelly’s instrument is still a sound to behold, scaling vocal and emotional heights the likes of which few except her have been able to reach since she burst on the scene almost a decade ago. It might not be as stunning as it used to be, but it’s certainly still worth mentioning.
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